Pity Party

Sometimes I feel like no one even reads my blog anymore. I suppose I can’t expect much, since I don’t post regular content. Yet, my WordPress friends seem to have disappeared. I have 154 followers and only hear from one or two of you guys. Is it me? Does my content suck? Have I changed too much? These are questions I would love to get some answers to. Please talk to me!

I love writing about music, but I do that for the magazine now. I honestly don’t feel like doing it here as well. I’ve also been thinking about my anonymity lately. My alter ego Asylum Attendant is growing all the time. Carpe Nocturne has thousands of readers who could look me up. People in my real life are starting to find out about my artist name and might even be reading this blog. All it takes is a Google search. I secretly always wanted that to happen so that I could be completely honest about myself. The sad reality is that not everyone will understand what I do here. I’m too out there for some people. I just hope I’m not judged too harshly. There’s no going back from the new world I’ve created for myself.

On the magazine end, I love sharing all of the exciting things I’m working on with you guys. Unfortunately, there are spies from competitors out there. I wish I was joking. Coincidences only go so far. While it will be hard for me to keep things under wraps, that is what I have to do moving forward. I work way too hard to have my ideas or the ideas of any of our other writers stolen. I can say that Carpe Nocturne will be debuting a new poetry column next month. Teatime, anyone? 😉

Work on my new house has been exhausting. Yesterday, I moved a bunch of furniture out to the garage and ripped up carpet in preparation for the floor renovation. I am so sore. We found hardwood floors under the carpet covered in mold. What a waste! Sadly, work on the floors will not begin until August 11. I’m hoping that the company’s schedule opens up and they can get started early. Because nothing else can be done until the floors are finished. My family and I made a shocking discovery when we started to rip up the carpet in one of the bedrooms. My deceased uncle had stashed a large sum of money under the carpet. While disturbing, it’s actually a good thing. Firstly, it proves that he wasn’t robbed, which was everyone’s worst fear. Secondly, my uncle was very distrusting of banks and kept large sums of money on his person for that reason. We were on the lookout for stacks of cash at his house because he was known to hide money in random places. My mom is very happy because the money will pay for my uncle’s headstone.

DIY gone wrong

DIY gone wrong

Floor 2

It’s almost vacation time! I’ll be heading to Lake Michigan for the first time in three years after the Fourth of July. I can’t wait for some rest and relaxation on a bluff overlooking the blue water. Seriously, Lake Michigan is just as beautiful as any ocean. I didn’t get a vacation at all last Summer thanks to the massive flood in my basement. So, this is a well deserved holiday. Who’s idea was it for people to have to work in the Summer anyway? I was also really hoping to go to Toronto for the first time in August, but my plans just didn’t work out. It would have been one of the most epic things I’ve ever done. Alas, there’s always next year.

My romantic life is just as confusing as ever. I love it when people from my past try to come back into my life. I don’t want to make the same mistakes again. When another person finally starts opening up, it’s difficult just to shrug them off. I know that nothing good will come of any kind of relationship with this person. But, I’m lonely. Luckily, I have the control and I think I’m strong enough to avoid them. So damn complicated.

I’ll end with a new song from indie artist Melanie Martinez. She has a Carrie moment and sets fire to her own birthday party when none of her friends show up. Melanie is all kinds of crazy and I can’t get enough. I would attend her pity party.

Happy Summer everyone!


10 thoughts on “Pity Party

  1. No,Asylum Attendant,YOUR Content does NOT SUCK!!!   For people who receive your posts via email(probably that’s most,if not all of your subscribers) and like me are Techno-Tards(not too many,I hope!) sometimes the site is a little hard /confusing to use,as far as opening music,etc.    As for WordPress:I think THAT DOES SUCK!!Badly engineered,hard to navigate,very user-unfriendly.     Keep up the Great Work,please,Asylum Attendant!   

    From: Asylum Attendant To: billhooper4484@yahoo.com Sent: Monday, June 22, 2015 12:37 AM Subject: [New post] Pity Party #yiv6689134851 a:hover {color:red;}#yiv6689134851 a {text-decoration:none;color:#0088cc;}#yiv6689134851 a.yiv6689134851primaryactionlink:link, #yiv6689134851 a.yiv6689134851primaryactionlink:visited {background-color:#2585B2;color:#fff;}#yiv6689134851 a.yiv6689134851primaryactionlink:hover, #yiv6689134851 a.yiv6689134851primaryactionlink:active {background-color:#11729E;color:#fff;}#yiv6689134851 WordPress.com | Asylum Attendant posted: “Sometimes I feel like no one even reads my blog anymore. I suppose I can’t expect much, since I don’t post regular content. Yet, my WordPress friends seem to have disappeared. I have 154 followers and only hear from one or two of you guys. Is it me? Does ” | |

  2. I see you fell into my conundrum. Who the heck wants to blog about music when you write about it all of the time? Seems redundant, and almost a waste of good writing. It’s like…I really should be using this for the magazine. It’s one less article I will have to write. Well, I do still read your blog. I just don’t post, or haven’t, but I do read. You always have interesting stuff to say, Jonathan 🙂

    Who knows, maybe one day I’ll shock even myself and write another post. Hopefully it’s not after a few beers because who knows what the heck I will type.

    • That makes me very happy that you still read my blog. It’s nice to have an audience of friends who care what I have to say. I don’t think I could ever give up my safe space here. Blogging is very intimate and liberating. I enjoy your inebriated blog posts. When the filter comes off, the truth comes out. I bet you have a lot more to share.

  3. I still stalk ~erm, read~ your blog. I definitely always will. c; It’s been a while since I’ve been here though, heh. ^.^” I will read whatever ya put out, music or not. You have a great writing style and I just enjoy reading your posts. (You also don’t suck, quit that negative thinking!) What do *you* feel like posting?
    I actually just tagged you for something, so there’s an idea. :p
    Renovation sounds like it’s going well. Your uncle is making me think of the song “The Legend of Wooley Swap” Haha, I love that song, haven’t heard it in years. Anyway, he sounds like a smart man.
    Vacation sounds awesome! Hope you have fun! (I realize this comment is way late…. but humor me and pretend it was posted before your vacation..) Gaah.
    Anyway, I now have yet another Melanie Martinez song stuck in my head and I don’t mind it. Hope to see you post again soon. c: *sending loads of virtual hugs your way*

    • You’re an awesome friend, Samm. Thanks so much for always encouraging and inspiring me. I think I’ll always post about random stuff. I’ve tried sticking to a theme and it never works. 😀

      Oh, the Darkling Tag looks like a blast! Thanks for thinking of me. I’m definitely going to do it and put it on video. I seriously haven’t done a video in forever. I’ll try to record it tonight.

      I just listened to that song for the first time. It’s very entertaining and I think my uncle would’ve liked it. 🙂 Thanks for the vacation well wishes. I just got back today and it was glorious. I’ll do a whole post about it with tons of pictures. 😉 Cannot wait for Melanie’s album to come out. She should be mega famous by now. I can just imagine us having a creepy fun party together. And all your plushies would be invited! lol

      • I am happy to be of help! I just hope you keep posting. ^.^ It’d really bite if you just stopped ~ you have a real talent with writing. c:
        I will be patiently awaiting it. 😀 It’s so fun to see everyone’s videos.
        I used to listen to that song (and the band) all the time when I was younger. I love the beat. xD
        Oooh, pictures sound great! I shall be awaiting that as well.
        Yes! I really want this album so bad. I’ve gotten really into her music lately and I can’t wait! >:D

  4. Pingback: Darkling Tag | Blood, Lace, and Faeries

  5. I still read your blog! (Although, seeing as this post was from Jun…lol) I admit I’ve sorta been invisible on WordPress lately. My grandmother died in January and we’ve had a hellish 6 months of settling her estate, lawyers, renovations of her house (We also pulled up all her carpet to find beautiful hardwood!). Luckily we finally got her house on the market this week, and my uncle seems to have gotten his lawyer’s bill and is leaving my mom the hell alone. Amazing how inheritance issues reveal a person’s true self.
    I can understand your feelings about your online artist identity and real identity. Most of my “real life” people don’t know about my online self, or artist self, for that matter. But don’t worry, because what you do and write is great, so if they don’t like it, it’s really their loss!
    I might have missed a post…. is the house actually YOURS (not your families)?? I am so jealous. I’m still stuck with my family and my highschool bedroom. If it is your place, I hope you decorate it to be amazingly goth 🙂

    • Thank you for still following my zany life. 🙂 I’m sorry to hear about your grandmother. I can’t believe people cover up hardwood. I’m at a point now where I’m almost ready to blend both identities. Yes, it is my very own house. Becoming a homeowner at 25 is pretty epic. I’m hoping to be moved in by Halloween and that means a spooky housewarming party. I can’t wait to start decorating. I’ll post before and after pictures when all is said and done. 😀

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