The End?

My secret’s out. This blog has been discovered by someone I never wanted to see it. As such, I don’t feel like this is a safe place anymore. I was going to share all of myself when I was ready. That choice was taken away from me. I now feel like I can’t be myself here. So, what’s the point in staying? This blog was created specifically to share the parts of myself that I was too afraid to show in real life. Now, there’s no mystery. The things I’ve shared here will probably be used to hurt me at a later time. I feel like Asylum Attendant is dead. I don’t even want to use the name anymore. There’s no more magic. The asylum has been torn down.

I don’t know what the future looks like. I’ve made some great friends in my (roughly) four years blogging here. I really started expressing myself and gained confidence in my writing abilities. I believe in myself now and other people do, too. When I was at my worst and felt like I had nothing, I had this blog and nice people sending me encouragement and support. I’m not sure why anyone has stuck around through my sporadic and depressing posts. I don’t deserve all of your kindness. I’m flakey, indecisive and a procrastinator. And still, my readers stick around. Thank you so much for that. I’ll never stop writing because, quite literally, I would die. I just might take on a different identity. Constantly changing, that’s me. I’ll let you all know once I figure out my next step. I hope you’ll all follow me down the next rabbit hole.

 

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8 thoughts on “The End?

  1. That is so sad to hear! *all the virtual hugs for you* It really sucks to hear that someone would ever use this to hurt you. I hope nothing terrible comes your way, you deserve all the happiness. :c
    To answer why I personally stick around, is because I love how enthusiastic and passionate you are about music and writing. I enjoy your stories and poems and reading your magazine stuff! As you’ve said, you’ve gained confidence and it really shows from your photoshoots to your writing. I’m very proud of you! And whatever the future holds, I wish you the best. ❤

    • Thank you so much. I feel better about keeping this blog now. I can’t give up. I want to give even more to my readers because I really care about all of you. I’m proud of you as well. I’ve watched you grow into such a creative, talented young woman who I admire. I feel like the future is always going to be unexpected. We just have to roll with it and stay true to ourselves. I know we will!

  2. I hope you wont give up! I’m not sure why anyone would choose to use this blog against you! I like reading your posts and seeing how your writing develops. It doesn’t matter if things are sporadic… I’m pretty much the the queen of sporadic posts right now 🙂 Whatever happens next, keep me updated please!

    • Thanks so much for hanging in there with me! I think I freaked out for a second and lost all hope. I can’t give this blog up. I’m happy to know that you enjoy my writing. I plan to do a lot more writing in 2016. 😉

    • Thank you for the support and reassurance. Your kind words mean a lot to me. You’re right, I’m stronger than any negativity or bad intentions. I’m staying! I still have a lot to say and share. 🙂

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